How many pills does it take to make a baby?

I've had quite a few people ask me about the diet that I followed to try and get pregnant. I really believe that eating a low glycemic diet helped us to make this happen. I felt the results of it within the first week and saw some dramatic changes in my mood, monthly cycle, and energy levels in the three months that I ate completely that way. But that is not all we did to try and conceive. We sort of tried a whole bunch of things at once, so I am not exactly sure what it was that made this happen for us, or if it was a mixture of all of it. All I know is that for me, it worked, and it worked fast once we got our ducks in a row.

I want to share what we did to try and make a baby for a few reasons. One is so that in the future when we try to get pregnant again I can remember what we did. Also, in case this information can help anyone out there that is trying to have a baby and suffering from infertility. I know that the title of this post is ridiculous. I'm sure that many of who read that though, "Ummm... I don't have to take any pills to make a baby!" While there are others of you who though, "It doesn't matter how many pills I take, I'm still not going to be able to make a baby." We are all different, our bodies are different. Our plans for our family are different and our trials and successes in life are different. There is no one way to do things, and sometimes things work and sometimes they don't.

*** This is a really long, detailed post with lots of links, etc. Please don't feel like you have to read the whole thing if you are not interested ;). 

For me... I have PCOS. I feel it was key for me to meet up with a health professional that understood that. I also think that there are different stages of PCOS. For some I think it might be more mild than for others, and I do think that my case is probably more mild than others because I have gotten pregnant five times before. One of my young women leaders growing up has PCOS and was not able to conceive any children, and has adopted 4 adorable kids, and that is how they grew their family. But I also know that so many times we hear people go get help for infertility and they say, "I was told that I have unexplained infertility... they can't tell what's wrong with me... we've tried everything... my only option is IVF." That is why it took me so long to go in and get checked out. I'm sharing this because I am grateful and happy to be a success story, the things we tried did work. And I hope that in whatever stage of baby making you are in that you are able to find the miracle that works for you. 

So here is my fertility story and what we did to make a baby...

First off, I did try to do natural methods to conceive before going to a doctors office for help. I knew that my hormones were off and I tried to take an herb called Vitex to regulate my cycles. This did help me regulate my cycles for the most part, but I wasn't getting pregnant taking this. I've also tried Fertility Blend which is a combination of different herbs and vitamins (this also has vitex in it) to boost fertility. I was taking this when I got pregnant with my first son, but didn't take it this time around... instead I just tried the Vitex.

I decided to go and see a doctor to get some help after we had been trying for 14 months with no luck. I met with a nurse practitioner and told her that I had been told in the past that I had PCOS and thought that could be why I wasn't getting pregnant. She did a quick ultrasound of my ovaries and said that everything looked great and she didn't think that I had PCOS. She sent me out the door with a prescription for Clomid and told me to come back in on the 12th day of my next cycle for a follicle check. She also did a blood test called a FSH test to see if my ovaries were functioning normally after going through chemo, and they were.

This is where I feel the stars aligned for me and I was able to meet with someone who could truly help me. The day I needed to have my follicle check done this nurse practitioner was on vacation, and I met with the nurse midwife they had at the center instead. I knew immediately that she was going to be able to help me. She instantly recognized the signs of PCOS on my ovaries from the "pearl necklace" affect that was there. That is where there are cysts that surround the ovary resembling a string of pearls. I also had many of the symptoms such as acne, weight gain, irregular cycles. I felt a great connection to this woman and I knew that she would do what she could to try and help us, and she was very confident that she could.

That's when things got a little crazy and I found out a week later that I had an ectopic pregnancy with my right ovary blowing up to the size of a grapefruit. We took a break and I got back on birth control pills for 2 months so that my ovary could heal and shrink back down to normal. Then the game was on and we got to work...

1. When my ovary looked OK again she first had me start taking Metformin which is a medication for people with type II diabetes. They have linked PCOS to problems with insulin resistance and have found that they have better conception rates for women with PCOS when they take Metformin. I started taking this twice a day and am still taking it. I plan on taking it until just before I deliver the baby because it reduces the risk of gestational diabetes, reduces the risk of miscarriage in women, and will hopefully help me to not have a huge baby since my first one was over 9 lbs (another sign of a PCOS mom). The side affects were bad for the first few weeks (digestion problems...) but my body is used to it now. I completely attribute not having gained as much weight this time around to taking Metformin.

2. This is when I also started eating a low glycemic diet. Basically no sugar, no white bread, no wheat bread, no rice. I could eat oatmeal, corn meal, and spelt flour for my carbs. Within one month of taking Metformin and eating this diet I had a completely normal 28 day cycle for the first time I can even remember. I do believe that these two things were able to stabilize my hormone problems so that I could ovulate and conceive.

3. During this month of hormone stabilization as she called it, I had a test done called a Hysterosalpingogram or HSG test. Basically they put a catheter up inside of your uterus and shoot some saline up there and look at your uterus and fallopian tubes under an ultrasound to see if there are any blockages to your tubes or scar tissue in your uterus that would prevent a pregnancy. It was a quick, in office procedure... that hurt like HELL!!! I didn't realize that it was going to be so painful. The doctor who performed the test told me just before it happened that it would be quite painful... but just for a minute. Whatever. I was in pain for days. I am not a screamer so to speak and I screamed right there in the office. It was right up there with a bone marrow biopsy on the pain scale. I just wish that I had talked to someone who had done this before so that I would have been a little more prepared for that. I was fully expecting to have some tube blockages or damage to my uterus from the different D&C's and C-section I've had done, but everything looked great! There was no sign of anything abnormal. They say that you are more fertile after having this procedure done because it cleans out your reproductive system and clears out your tubes.

4. When my cycle started after the HSG was done I took a fertility drug called Femara. Because of what happened when I took Clomid (which is the normal, go to fertility drug), I am no longer able to take Clomid or any injectable fertility drugs. The chances of having hyperstimulation syndrome again are so high I would most likely cause great damage to my ovaries to the point that I could lose them. Femara was really my only option at this point. Femara is actually a drug that they use to treat breast cancer in patients who are past menopause. My midwife assured me that it works completely differently than Clomid and I would not have the same problems that I did with that. She also said that this drug works really well with women who have PCOS. I took it for 5 days to stimulate ovulation and went in on day 12 for another follicle check to see if I would be ovulating. I did not have any strange side affects from taking this drug. I know people talk about how crazy and emotional fertility drugs make them... that was not the case for me. I felt completely normal.

***A little side story here. This is a shot of my one perfect little follicle that was seen at that appointment. My midwife said she really felt like this was going to work and that I would be getting pregnant this round. I told her that I couldn't go there, I couldn't get my hopes up for this yet. I've had so many big disappointments in life, I just couldn't go there and get crushed if it didn't happen. But when she left the room to write out a prescription I snapped a little picture of this perfect follicle with my phone. I guess this was my little way of showing an inkling of hope. So this picture is half of the baby that is growing inside of me, before it met up with my husbands half...

5. On day 19 of this cycle I started to take Progesterone and a baby aspirin every day. The progesterone is said that help your uterus in the lutal phase of pregnancy when the egg is implanting. It is explained pretty well here. I don't know that I have a lutal phase defect and if that is why I've had miscarriages or any other fertility problems, but my midwife was insistent that I take it. Once I found out I was pregnant we upped my dose to twice a day until I was 14 weeks pregnant. This drug made me really dizzy, tired, loopy. It was awful! But if it helped me to maintain this pregnancy then it was worth it. I also took a baby aspirin everyday and will continue to take this throughout the pregnancy. Studies have made a connection to lower miscarriage rates when women take a low dose of aspirin everyday. Also, I felt like this was a bit of a shot in the dark and we don't know if I really need this... but are doing it anyway just in case.

6. Have sex with your husband. Really? I still had to do that even with all of this? Ha!!! I have to say that was stressful. Having all of this going on really does put the pressure in the love making department. I'm grateful to have such a supportive partner who stood by my side through this crazy ride... and that even though I was sure we missed our window of opportunity because of his crazy work schedule we somehow made it happen. I think that doing fertility treatments kills the romance in baby making... enough said about that.

I started step one of this the end of October and had a positive pregnancy test on December 24th, so we got pregnant the first month that we tried all of this. Like I said, we did a lot of things all at once so I'm not sure which part of this is what really worked or if it was a combination of everything. Also, three of these drugs (Metformin, progesterone, and baby aspirin) are said to prevent miscarriage which is why I am still taking these or took them for a while.

I'm still a very firm believer that God sends his children down when it's their time to come. I wrote a post a long time ago about this and I still believe strongly that we are in very little control in all of this. With that being said, I also believe that there is knowledge and technology on earth today that is to help us. The way that everything worked out for me, meeting up with my midwife the way that I did, having to take a break for my hormones to get in order, miraculously getting a prescription for Femara by the doctor who had done my HSG before Thanksgiving weekend which turned out to be the exact time that I needed to take it and the office was closed for 4 days... yes I do believe this whole process what orchestrated in a way that was beyond my control, and exactly what I needed. All of this was done with lots and lots of prayer. I put off seeking help for a long time because I felt like when God was ready to send a baby to our family then he would! But I've come to realize that sometimes God has us go through different experiences to teach us things, to show us his grace and truly put our trust in him, and for us to go through different experiences. I don't think that by getting help with physical limitations we are "playing God". I think we are taping into the resources that God has given to us in this day and age, and am so grateful for that.

I hope that if you are struggling with infertility that this can give you some hope to keep searching for your own private miracle. Keep seeking to build your family, because family is important. Be open to whatever road your journey takes you whether it be fertility treatments, adoption, surrogacy... it is a different journey for each of us, and I truly hope that you can find the answers that you search for.

Holiday salad...

I volunteered to bring salad to Thanksgiving this year. I love salad! I love making it, eating it... I guess you can say I'm kind of a salad snob. I came up with this combination last year for Christmas and made it again this year for Thanksgiving. It was just as wonderful as I remembered it! Which was good because there were lots of naughty Thanksgiving foods that could have covered my plate, but I tried to be good and ate a lot of this yummy salad instead.

Here's what's in it:
 - green leaf lettuce (my favorite kind to make salads with)
 - grilled asparagus
 - pomegranate seeds
 - blue cheese
 - candied almonds

The combination was pretty to look at and amazing! To candy the almonds I used about 1 cup of slivered almonds and 1/2 cup of brown sugar (brown sugar is supposedly low glycemic... I don't buy it. It's still sugar! But I did use it and pretended that it was okay to eat). Put those two things in a sauce pan over medium high heat. Stir until the sugar melts and coats the nuts. Make sure you watch them and stir the whole time... they can burn if left unattended. They will be a nice gooey brown. Then spread out over parchment paper and let dry. Break apart into salad.

** A little update on my new eating plan. It's going really great! I'm totally used to eating this way now. I don't feel hungry during the day anymore and I eat when I'm suppose to and eat things that are good for my body. Pretty great if you ask me! I'm kicking myself a little for going on about how the weight was "melting off my body". HA! Seriously, that's when it pretty much ended. I didn't lose another pound until a week ago and now I'm down 9 lbs total. Oh well... it's something right!

Thanksgiving was hard. I reserved my salad plate for the naughty foods and I did eat a few bites of mashed potatoes and gravy and two little delightful candied yams. They were so yummy, but I only let myself eat a little bit. Pie, was another story though. I told myself I could eat one piece of my mom's amazing lemon meringue pie which is my favorite in the whole world. Well... I at two pieces of lemon and one piece of chocolate pie! I know, so super naughty. Oh well. And then the next day I went to a going away party for my best friend who is moving and ate sushi. I was hoping they would have brown rice there for the sushi but they did not. So I totally ate white rice sushi which is a HUGE no no. Oh well. Now I'm back on track and feeling better about slipping last weekend. I feel better too confessing to all of you here. But I guess that's not too bad for 1 1/2 months of eating low glycemic right?

Bread or Baby?

 

Hi my name is Meg... and it's been 14 days since I've had a baked treat.

And that last treat was a pumpkin chocolate chip cookie...

I grabbed it on my way out the door to my appointment. I had every intention of eating a good breakfast that morning, but time got away from me and I needed to grab something quick to make it there on time. I finished it before I even left the neighborhood. I almost turned around to go get the other two that I'd left on the counter but I knew if I did I would be late. So I did not... and I completely regret that now.

I had been told a few months before upon the confirmation of my PCOS that I needed to change my diet. But I had put it off. It was birthday season after all. And turns out I'm a complete emotional eater and took up quite the Dr. Pepper habit after my ectopic pregnancy in August. Every day I said, "tomorrow I will eat better" but it never happened.

Laying back on the hard table having an ultrasound done to see the state of my poor ovary the need for this change was confirmed. My midwife said, "Good news, your ovary is back to normal. But it's very polycystic. We need to make some major changes here to help you have a baby."

Then she said something that no health care provider has ever said to me before.

"How's your weight and eating going? {flipping through her notes}. You've gained 3 lbs since I saw you two months ago. You haven't changed your diet yet have you?"

I told her what I believed to be true. That I felt like I was completely addicted to sugar. I eat it everyday. I feel like I'm addicted to crack (not that I know what that would be like but I'm sure it's close).

Then we had the conversation that immediately got me off of this sugary substance...

"No more. You can't do it. Sugar is so hard on your body, especially on girls with PCOS. You need to cut all sugar. No honey, no agave. Nothing baked. No bread. No potatoes. No starchy foods whatsoever. You also need to be eating protein four times a day. Oh... and no cheating. This is not a diet to lose weight, you have to do this everyday. You don't get a cheat day or a cheat meal... this is everyday."

Next week is Halloween... I dared to mutter.

"You're right! And then Thanksgiving, and Christmas, and Valentines Day... then throw in all the birthday's that happen. There is never a good time of the year to make a change like this. You have to do it right now. Today. This second."

 I looked her in the eye and said, "Okay, this is it. No more."

I'm not sure what it was that flipped the switch for me, but I really did decide in that minute that I was going to completely change my diet and see if this will work. There are lots of things that we are trying right now to help me get pregnant, but this is one thing that rests completely on my shoulders. Every time I open my mouth and eat food I say to myself:

"Do you want bread, or a baby?"
"Do you want a donut, or a baby?"
"Do you want pop, or a baby?"

Baby has won out every single time.

I'm so grateful that I had a full five days of doing this before the first Halloween party hit. It was hard, standing there looking at the delicious spread on the table and not being able to eat a single thing. I almost cried tears of joy when my sister in law came in with a plate of deviled eggs (thank you Nicole!!!) and I was finally able to eat something that wouldn't be cheating.

Halloween was fine. I am still in awe that I sat around our house for days with candy everywhere and did not take a single bite. I love candy. But I want a baby more. It really took about a week and now I am not tempted at all to eat these things.

Something else I feel I need to mention. I pray. A lot. I pray that I will be able to resist food temptations. That I will be able to stick with this and eat healthy. I think that has made a world of difference as I've gone through this change.

So here's the deal. Girls with PCOS have higher levels of a male hormone (androgen's) which causes them to not ovulate, have irregular periods, gain weight, have acne... etc, etc. There is also a link to insulin resistance which they think causes this hormone problem. So eating a low glycemic diet and taking a diabetic medication (yep... on that too) is suppose to help girls like me get pregnant.

I've bought a book called The Glycemic Index for Dummies and now that I've learned a little bit more about it it's not so bad. For example, I can have dark chocolate!!! Hallelujah! At the end of the day when I've been super good all day and eaten what I'm suppose to I get a tablespoon of peanut butter and cover it in dark chocolate chips. It's pure heaven people.

As of today I am even down 7 lbs. The weight is literally melting off. This weight I've been carrying for three years is melting away!!! And to think this is all because of bread and sugar!?! Insane...

I've always tried to eat healthy, and I thought that I was being healthy by eating whole wheat bread. I ate a lot of bread. For breakfast I used to have whole wheat toast with peanut butter and fruit. Lunch, a sandwich. Dinner a lot of the time would be whole wheat pasta or something in a whole wheat tortilla. Turns out whole wheat is just as bad as white when it comes to raising your insulin levels. I had no clue. It makes me sad to think that this could be part of what has kept us from having more kids in the last 1 1/2 years. Something as "healthy" as whole wheat bread...

I've always been against diets that make you cut out food groups (like the Atkin's diet). So I just want to clarify that I am not cutting out carbs. I'm just cutting out carbs that have a high glycemic index. I still eat oatmeal and brown rice daily. I eat quinoa. I've made naan with spelt (a low GI grain). So I am not cutting all carbs. Our bodies need carbs, so I'm learning about what ones I can have and what I can't.

I realize that this might not be a "cure all" for me, but we're giving it a shot. And even if I'm not able to have a baby this will make me healthier, help me lose weight, and hopefully help me be a better mom and wife for my family.

So I'm saying goodbye to my runs through the McDonald's drive through to get a Dr. Pepper. Goodbye york peppermint patties that jump into my pile of groceries on the conveyor belt at the grocery store. Goodbye whole wheat bread. Goodbye Twix. Goodbye my beloved pumpkin chocolate chip cookies... Goodbye, and good riddance!

photo from here