Leap...

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I've been thinking a lot about faith lately. How we need to actually have times in life where we need to exercise our faith in order for it to grow and become stronger.

Moving back home to Utah was a really scary thought for me. I knew that we wanted to move back, but just because you want something doesn't mean it's the best decision or what you should do. I knew that my husband really, really wanted to move back, but there was so much at risk... this was not a decision that I could make or do just based on want.

So I did what I usually do in situations such as this. I prayed. I prayed a lot. I prayed that if this was what we should do that I would know it, somehow. My answer came the first weekend in September. I was driving up to central Utah to go camping with my in laws. My boy was asleep in the back of the car and I was longingly gazing at the beautiful mountains around me. Is it time to come back? I wondered and prayed for the thousandth time....

Yes, I felt it throughout my whole being.

Yes it was time. This was what we needed to do. And somehow, all the little details of life would work out so that we could.

Coming back was a path of great resistance. We both had jobs in Vegas, something we did not have up in Utah. My husband was even offered an amazing nursing job in Vegas, straight out of school {I haven't told this to very many people, because then I just feel like we are super crazy}. He turned it down. When he told me he turned it down I felt really good about that decision. Somehow this was all going to work out, I just didn't know how. Trent was delayed in taking his nursing licensure test by two whole months due to misplaced paperwork. At the time this felt like huge problem, but in those two months we were able to save up enough money with both of us working for us to live on when we got here. That money lasted us until last week when he started his new job. Huge blessing. We also needed to sell our little condo that was worth half of what we had bought it for 3 years earlier due to the housing crash in Vegas. We waited till August to put it up on the market and attempt to short sale it. We had an offer two days later, in cash, for our asking price. We still had to do a short sale, but it was not as bad as I feared it would be. Our closing papers came as we were driving the moving truck up to Utah... I miss my cute little place, but it worked out for the best. One of my biggest hold ups... health insurance. Hello!?! I'm in remission for cancer, and leaving my job meant I would lose coverage. Have faith Meg, have faith. This was the biggest pill for me to swallow, and like everything else... this too has fallen into place and we were able to keep me covered until new insurance started. It's been a blessing to watch these small and simple miracles take place as we've made this transition in our lives.

In my mind we needed to have a job before we made the move, but as I realized this was not going to happen I also realized that sometimes we can't see how things are going to work out. If we did, then it wouldn't be required for us to have faith. I had my confirmation that this was the right thing for us, and now I needed to put my trust and faith in that we would be taken care of, somehow, some way...

I wish I could say that I had perfect faith through this process but I did not. So many times I said, maybe we did the wrong thing... we should have stayed in Vegas... things are not going to work out. My poor husband. I don't know how he stands my wavering faith. But he does, and for that I'm grateful.

As I have sat back these last three months since we made the move I have been in complete awe as to how everything has worked out. Trent would not have been able to get the job he did get if we had still been down in Vegas, sending in applications online. The little details of our lives that have been thrown up in the air are all falling back into place right where they need to be.

I'm grateful for this experience and what it has taught me. There were lots of people who I'm sure thought we were totally crazy for doing this, at this time, in this economy... but it was right for us. Every day I feel great peace in knowing that we made the right move for our family.

I still miss Las Vegas everyday... I miss my friends, I miss my amazing job and co-workers, I miss the warm winter, I miss our jewish grandma that we adopted, I miss my ward, I miss teaching lessons in Relief Society, I miss being able to walk to Target whenever I pleased, I miss my life down there. But I know that I'm where I need to be now. I know that this is where we want to raise our little boy. I know that we will be blessed for doing what we felt was right... we already have been. I'm grateful that we were able to take that leap, and that the landing has been wonderful.

I'm excited for this next step in life... whatever it may be, and am grateful that I am able to take it at home, with my family and friends by my side. I'm thankful that my faith has been strengthened through this process, and hopefully next time I'm required to leap I can do it without hesitation.

... and happy leap day by the way...